Category Archives: General

Expensive Chocolate

Chocolate is one of those things that has fans.  And I mean real fanatics.  The snobby kind.  Chocolate is expensive because people will pay crazy amounts of money for it. I once spent $400 on a bag of chocolate covered almonds from Menard’s.  And how was it? you ask.  I don’t know.  I didn’t get to eat it! You may have noticed something odd about the background of this photograph, so let me tell you the story of the $400 bag of Dark Chocolate Almonds. It’s a Tuesday and I remember this because it’s the day I tutor and Marissa gets her hairs did.  I get home first because Marissa’s …

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We need to talk about Jack

(Warning: This post will be loaded with pictures of a really cute dog.) This is Jack. He is a dog, but to be clear, that’s not the worst thing about him.  We were told he is some kind of pit bull mix, but to be honest, I’m starting to suspect he is just a straight up pit bull and the word “mix” was thrown in to make his adoption more likely.  Oh sure he looks cute and charming, but he is clearly a man eating machine. Rumor has it he was turned into the local pound wearing a collar and leash while still holding the hand — and just the …

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Woodworking with a Dummy

Let me be perfectly clear, despite a semester of woodworking in high school and a lifetime of living with a carpenter, I do not know what I’m doing.  I’m clueless, and I’m armed with 11 pounds and 5,600 rpms of blade spinning goodness.  I’m one little screw up from losing a finger or an arm or a leg. Not that it’s bad to be missing one of those things.  I’ve never met a cabinet maker that had all of his fingers and if I did meet that cabinet maker, I probably wouldn’t hire him. I’m more of a hobbyist though, and I need all my fingers for typing entertaining blog …

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Year in Review

You may recall that some time ago I set some yearly goals.  Now that year is winding down rapidly, and I owe you an update on the things  I’ve accomplished — or failed to accomplish as the case mostly is.  I had 7 goals, and while the original blog post spread them over 3 different sections of the year, they came out in reality all out of order.  So I’ll address them here in no particular order. Revisit Neville, my NaNoWriMo project from last year This one actually happened.  It got a proper name, The Man Out of Time, and was largely rewritten to be much better than the original.  I guess I …

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Buying a House | Viewings | The Corpse

In a cute little neighborhood deep in the extremely middle class Fishers, Indiana, sits an orange house.  Yes, orange.  It’s down a road of 60s and 70s homes, mostly bi- and tri-levels with big trim pieces on their corners and around their windows.  It’s a bit like traveling back in time to the Brady Bunch house but more modest. This orange house had the right location and a big yard, but it was… orange.  A number of seriously questionable design decisions had been made in that bi-level over the years.  There was the exterior door, now blocked off from both sides, the flimsy thin walls that turned the basement into …

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Buying a House | Viewings | The Broken House

You all are going to have to put up with just a couple more posts before I tell you about the corpse.  This one will be blessedly short for your benefit. This actually occurred before we had decided to purchase a home, while we were still looking at rentals.  One company has this automated system where you can let yourself into homes.  You fill out a form online and drive to the house.  They give you a code that opens a lockbox.  When you request that code, someone is assigned to help you choose a place.  This person, in my case, was named Emily. My wife and I looked at …

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Buying a House | Viewings | The Squatter House

I know I promised to tell you about that time my wife, real-estate agent, and I found a corpse, but I need to build up to that.  First, let me tell you about the squatter house.  This place is enormous.  3,200 square feet split over two stories.  It has a sun-room, double garage with workshop space, and a loft.  The kitchen accounts for about a third of the downstairs, making it the largest entertaining area we had seen.  This place was also a short walk from Geist Reservoir, Indianapolis’s equivalent of a posh neighborhood.  Seriously, Geist has a sailing club and a yacht club.  People here are under the delusion that …

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Buying a House | Viewings | Poverty House

As mentioned before we probably viewed somewhere around 30 or more houses.  I made a rule early on to leave any house once we start checking out the personal items rather than the home.  It was a rule based on how I’d feel if complete strangers were walking through the home I was living in making careful notes on everything.  Lots of times, I or Marissa would make a comment on a picture or an item of clothing, and I’d say, “Alright, it’s time to go.”  It doesn’t take much time in a house to know if you’re interested or not.  Still, for the sake of completeness, we continued through each house. …

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Buying a House | Part 2

So that offer I mentioned months ago didn’t pan out.  They came back asking for a higher price than our initial offering, and given time to think about it, we backed down.  It didn’t seem worth it.  If it had been a place I loved I could have done it. It was a fine house, but I started wondering if I could live with the bathrooms laid out like that for even a second, then I started thinking about the cost and mess of renting a concrete saw.  Well, I guess we’ll just keep the jack-and-jill bathrooms then.  And I suppose it’s ok that the front door opens right into the …

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D and Rissy Buy A House

Have you ever bought a house? I don’t recommend it.  There is an awful lot of money juggling, people talking, paper signing, decision making to do, and I hate every one of those things.  I just don’t feel old enough to own a home.  Yesterday I spent an hour reading comic books about Magneto.  I once missed everything my wife said at a dinner because I was thinking about Batman.  I’m not ready for responsibility.  I’m scared of responsibility.  In fact, let’s go down a list of my fears. Marissa Spiders Public Speaking Not saying something important when in front of people Responsibility Oh sure, I try to play it …

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